Your Soul Lessons – The Wisdom From Conflict

 September 19, 2013
Posted by Dr. Monique


Being in conflict with someone can be disappointing, frustrating and damaging to your relationship.  It can leave you angry, revengeful and wondering, “What did I do wrong?”  It may even make you ask, “What is wrong with me, why do I keep attracting these people?”    When you have a conflict with someone it is a direct link to a lesson that you are still working on.

We all have soul lessons that we are here to learn in this lifetime.  These lessons are the very challenge that we are here to overcome. Your soul is on this journey to master these lessons and the people in your life often serve as the teachers. These lessons are called soul lessons or karmic lessons.  For example, I completed a numerology chart for one of my clients and one of her Karmic lesson is to become an expert in one of her many gifts. She has many talents, but those with this Karmic lesson often lack the focus to become truly knowledgeable in any one area.  Often because they can be great at so many things they lose focus or become concerned that they won’t be able to do everything they are good at or interested in.  Her conflict was with a friend that told her she was flighty and didn’t know what she wanted out of life.  Her friend accused her of not being able to be in a relationship because she didn’t stay focused on anything for long.  Her friend insisted my client needed therapy to uncover why she gave up so easily on her goals.   This tongue lashing cut deep and was painful. In fact it caused a conflict so deep that these best friends didn’t speak to each other for months.   As my client was sharing her story, I told her the conflict with her friend was directly connected to her  Karmic lesson.  Could her friend have been less cruel?  Of course, but we aren’t going to focus on her friend for now, we are going to focus on my client’s Karmic lesson.  The lesson was simple, others could see that she was talented and capable of doing amazing things. She couldn’t see it so clearly because she lacked the discipline to focus on one skill and make it work for her.  She consistently gave up before her breakthrough to success.  When things got a little challenging she would change and try something else.  The really cool thing is, as we began to dive deep into this Karmic lesson, she discovered that many of her relationships were filled with messages regarding this lesson. She had experienced many conflicts at work and with friends who felt she wasn’t dependable and lacked focus. This lesson was also reflected in her finances.  She has changed jobs often and has started, but never followed through on a number of businesses.  I assured her that once she mastered this lesson, she would attract people who support her and she would find her career would become much more successful too.

Mastering your Karmic lesson however, doesn’t mean it will not rear its little head again from time to time. Your Karmic lessons stay with you for life.  However, as you master your lessons, they will have less impact on your life. Mastery means when these lessons do show up they are not as dramatic and painful as before.

There is so much Wisdom that you can learn from your conflict with others, if you will just take a moment to connect with Your Divine Council of Angels, Ancestors and Spirit Guides for guidance and answers.  These are six things that I have learned about conflict personally and through my work as a professional Intuitive.

6 Wisdoms From Conflict – You can use these now to understand your soul lessons. 

1. Lesson from the universe. Conflict can be a signal from the universe that there is a lesson that you need to learn that you aren’t getting.  Sometimes the messages are subtle, like minor conflicts, but if we continue to ignore the lessons, they can turn into major conflicts.

2. Did you ignore your intuition?  Check back.  Did your intuition send you messages or signs that you chose to ignore consciously or unconsciously?   Often your inner voice will send you a message letting you know that something isn’t right about the situation or the person.  We are taught to distrust our inner guidance and depend more on logic.  Before or after a conflict, check in with your Divine Council for guidance.

3. Having conflict with someone doesn’t mean that you or the other person is bad.  Often when people are having a disagreement, it is because you both have life lessons you are working on.  Most of the time, it isn’t really about that “thing” you are arguing about. Usually the actions in the disagreement – how you respond, how you handle the situation, what you say is where the lessons are.  Give each other some slack. Back away for a moment and ask yourself….what is the lesson here? Not sure? Ask your Divine Council for help.

4. Some hurt people, hurt people. If someone is in pain emotionally or physically in one area of his/her life, often times it will be difficult to avoid bringing that pain into another life area. I have found in many situations when people are hurting, they will often times hurt those around them consciously, or unconsciously.  They will find fault, gossip and look for ways to share their pain.   Example: A co-worker or business associate might be having some health, relationship or personal challenges that may impact their interaction with you.  Perhaps they are always on edge or constantly complaining and finding fault.  You might be the reflection of the lesson they are working on in the moment.  Politely back away and give them space.

5. What was your contribution to the conflict? It is easy to identify another’s fault in a conflict, but take a moment to see what you are responsible for.  Both people are responsible for the demise of a relationship.  It is unlikely, that somehow both people didn’t play a part in the disagreement.  This doesn’t mean you are 100 % responsible for the conflict, but it does mean that on some level you contributed to the problem.  Maybe you didn’t speak up early on in the relationship?  Perhaps you didn’t completely share all of the information needed for the person to make a good decision about something?  Maybe your intuition told you this person wasn’t a good match for you, but you entered into the relationship anyway.  What was your contribution?  What can you take away from this experience?

6. Relationships are mirrors.  If we are experiencing internal conflict, it will show up and be reflected back to you in the people you attract. If you are not good at keeping commitments to yourself, you may have a conflict with someone who doesn’t keep their commitments with you. When you have a conflict ask yourself, did I create this as a result of something going on inside of me?  Did I talk about people or gossip and now perhaps I am being gossiped about or talked about negatively? Was I hard on someone or critical of them and now I am being criticized?  The answers may be yes or they may be no, but it is important to check in.

Next time you are having a conflict with someone, stop and ask, what are my lessons so I can move on to Karmic mastery.  And by all means do your best to resolve the conflict and have a discussion with the person.  However, the outcome is usually better when you understand the lessons and wisdom from the conflict before you talk to the person about the problem.

Here is an affirmation that you can use to help you understand your Karmic lessons.

Conflict is just a lesson from the universe to help me master my Karmic lessons.  I am divinely guided to a resolution.

If you would like to hear the Wisdom of Conflict Guided Meditation and Inspirational Message from Your Weekly OM, post a comment and I will send you the audio.