Clicking the Pause Button Before You React

 September 15, 2014
Posted by Dr. Monique

Pausing and taking a deep breath before we
react can shift the energy of the outcome.


Have you had the experience of reacting in a way that was less than ideal upon hearing bad news, being unfairly criticized or being told something you didn’t want to hear? I know I have. When our emotions are triggered, they tend to take over, causing us to rapid fire before we realize it. This inhibits our ability to pause before we speak. You may feel compelled to give him or her “a piece of your mind.” Often unconsciously we believe that the tension will be released by expressing ourselves in some way, whether it is yelling back at the person yelling at you, or rushing to deliver words of comfort to a friend in trouble. Much can be gained and you may even shift the outcome if you teach yourself to remember to pause and take a deep breath before responding to the shocks, insults, and misunderstandings that come your way in life.


Your initial thoughts are not always the best ideas to express for you or the other person at the moment. For example, reacting to childish rage with childish rage will only escalate the negativity and possibly create irreversible damage. Similarly, when we react defensively or thoughtlessly, we often end up feeling regret over our words or actions. We can save ourselves a tremendous amount of pain, embarrassment, and frustration by taking a deep breath and tuning into ourselves, and the other person before we respond. I have often been one for the quick comebacks and responses. Sometimes they work, but other times, after the fact, I felt that I could have handled the situation differently and had a better outcome. When I take a moment to listen to the other person, take a deep breath and from this place determine my response, I find the outcome is always better. This does not necessarily mean that you say nothing, although in some cases, that may be the best option.


Some situations may require an immediate response, but even just a moment of grounding before you respond can help enormously. The next time you find yourself in an emotionally charged situation, before you react, try to push the pause button by taking a deep breath. Feel your feet grounded in the earth, feel the air on your skin, and listen for a response to arise within you. Ask for guidance, check in with your intuition, rather than just going with the first thing that pops into your head. You may find that at that moment, you can move beyond a reaction and into a more subtle and creative realm of response, where something new can happen. The outcome may not always be mutually beneficial. You may not be able to resolve the issue. You may not even be heard by the other person. However, when you respond from a place within you that holds the better response, you will walk away feeling better than if you fly off the handle. I hope you never have a situation where you are angry or upset, but if you are living a full life that will be almost impossible. If you do have a moment when you feel triggered to respond, try taking a deep breath. Later, let me know how it works for you.


Sometimes your response to challenging relationships or conflicts is rooted in the experience of an Ancestor.   For more information about how Hidden and Historical Grief might be impacting your life check out this blog post:


  Who is Dr. MoniqueDr. Monique…..

Dr. Monique, The International Business Intuitive and Mystic Mentor, teaches entrepreneurs and    leaders how to channel their Spirit Guides so that they can be clear and confident about their decisions, grow their business faster and help their clients achieve extraordinary results.

Her clients call her the sanest and “normal” spiritual teacher and channeler they have worked with. She is grounded and able to take what others often consider “woowoo” and turn it into everyday practical strategies that any entrepreneur and leader can use to enhance his/her life, relationships, finances, career and business.

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